I am bad at school. It's been over a month and I have still not gotten myself into gear this semester. I am simply unmotivated. I spend all my time going out on weekends, watching television online, hanging out randomly with people during the week, reading time-wasting websites like www.textfromlastnight.com or www.mylifeisaverage.com, watching vloggers on YouTube or creeping people on facebook. For instance, right now, I am watching House. Season 5 to be exact. I got it for my dad for his birthday yesterday but since I am also behind in the show I am catching up as well. I have a virtual lab rat experiment I could be doing, or some Edgar Allen Poe short stories I could read, or some Psychology definitions I could memorize…but I'm not. I really hope I'm not wasting my time in university.
I'm an English major. I'm spending thousands of dollars to go to school to read and act like a scholar by analyzing the things that I read. I'm not doing all those readings though. I've heard that in general most English majors have to pick and choose the books that they read because they realize that there is simply too much for them to stay on top of everything…but I'm not even doing a little bit. I need to start trying. I'm going to start trying.
Tomorrow I have a class from 9-11. It's my Renaissance to Restoration English course (2200). I'm supposed to have finished Absalom and Achitophel. I don't know if you've read this poem (by John Dryden) but it's difficult to follow - at least for me it is. I'm sure there are a ton of people out there that understand it and follow it perfectly well. I am not one of these people. I was having so much trouble getting through it that I had to find an audio recording of it online that I could listen to while I cleaned up my room because I kept reading the same lines over and over again. This poem is pages long. Anyway, the recording is about an hour long. I've gotten through just over half of it. This is a big deal for me and it really shouldn't be. The fact that this is an accomplishment is kind of pathetic.
I'm wondering if maybe I'm in the wrong place. Maybe if I went to a different school and didn't live at home while at school I would do a bit better. I wouldn't get distracted so easily. My house is always a mess and it really bothers me. I'm not someone that can handle working in a cluttered space…it gets to me.
I think I should start staying at school more…actually utilizing the library at my school? I never do. In fact, the only time I've been in there this year so far, I watched an episode of Heroes between my classes while I watched my virtual rat. So I haven't done any real work yet. I have an essay coming up. I think I need the assignments to get me into shape. Once I start writing, maybe it'll make me start working more? We'll see.
Anyway, this was a pretty bland entry. It was essentially me just…bragging about my abilities to procrastinate? Definitely not something to be proud of. I'm gonna go to bed now I guess…after this episode of House that I'm watching finishes. I'm going to get up in the morning, drive my mom to work (because my car is currently out of commission) and I'm going to use the extra time I have from getting up early to finish listening to the audio recording after I have a shower and then go to my English 2200 seminar prepared since I will actually have "read" the material! Yay me!
Ok…so that wasn't really a closure to my blog. Well…I guess a better one is for me to say…this blog is going to be about me. I'm going whine, complain, brag, share my excitement when something amazing happens to me, share my sadness when something completely un-amazing happens…and just be the real me. I don't know if people will read it, but if they do…they'll hear about everything. I hope that's ok with them. I have another post that I might put up or I might not…it's kind of extremely personal…and I'd probably have to change the names in it. I'm done talking now…I guess. I have so much I want to say…but it'll require more than one blog post…so I'm gonna do it all over time.
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